Do any of you hide from you cell phone when you’re having a bad day/week/month? I’ve noticed I do that when I’m depressed or agitated. I don’t conciously do it. I just go to use my phone and find it the bottom of my purse with a dead battery and covered with lint and tobacco crumbs. I guess it’s part of isolation thing. I don’t want to talk to anyone for fear I’ll come across as a sad sack or an irritating beotch. I feel obligated to over compensate and put on the happy clown hat. “Oh everything is fine and wonderful.” (I say when I’m a quivering mass of protoplasm cowering in bed with a pillow over my head.)

I think that part of it is even though I logically understand that bipolar is an illness, part me is still embarrassed and ashamed. I put stigma on my own self. Go figure.