This is likely a disappointing thought but to my knowledge one does not recover from mental illness. True, one can recover a sense of normalcy through drugs, therapy, and management, but the disease is like diabetes or kidney disease in that it cannot be cured. It is daunting at times the knowledge this just isn't going to go away; and, at times we feel like throwing in the towel at the very time we need to step up our work and attention.

A lot of people here can relate. It is good you have reached out. If you can reach out in the real world too. If you haven't a therapist already now might be a good idea to get yourself one. Even a chat with your family doctor might open up the doorway to some help and improvement.