I have a coworker that is impatient and wants to take shortcuts to speed up the work. She also likes to bring attention to herself and her accomplishments. I get irritated at her regularly and try to accept that she isn't going to change just because I want her to be different. Her perspective and experience in life is different. She wants the feeling accomplishment so much that she wants to do everything fast. I am opposite because I fear that people will see my work as flawed, so I spend more time on my tasks trying to insure there are no imperfections. She probably gets irritated at my methodical pace.

If I only look at how her behavior causes rework and bothers me, I will have a difficult time interacting with her. If I focus on possible reasons she does what she does, I feel more compassion towards her instead of irritation. I think the reason she wants attention and to rush through her work is because she has a deep need for praise. I can guess she might not have been praised much in her life, so she needs this extra attention and praise to help her self-esteem. She might be similar to the person J you mentioned that needs attention to feel good about himself.

I know I do things out of fear and anxiety that probably seem strange to others. I feel people behave in these ways because it helps them with a need that they haven't been able to resolve. It helps to feel more accepting when I think about others in that way.