I see a new t today. I'm supper nervous... Let alone, the pain from my cyst is making it hard to think.... I'm on an anti- inflammatory, but if I sit up the pain is worse. Laying on my back feels better....

Then there is how I feel... I don't feel like DBT is working, or is it meds, or is it the pain!???? Is it bad that I hope to be put in the hospital for the cyst to be removed. Then something will go right for me.

Or then again maybe they will send me in patient.... Then maybe my disability will go through. Simply put, I'm frustrated to begin again with a new t. And I don't know if they can help, am I just so far gone that I'll die by sui... Who am I kidding, I won't do it. I hate my life