Thank you both. I appreciate your reading and replying. I am in such pain as I've never known. We wrote every day for almost 3 years.

Well, I took the reins and posted a good-bye to her. I wanted the chance to thank her for all she's done. I needed to be the one to end it and I had begun that process but it didn't go the way I thought it would.

It's a hard relationship to explain. Motherly at first, so warm and nuturing. Then it was therapy really. Then for the last year or so it was just personal.

Thank you again for taking the time to read and reply . It means a lot to me right now.