Red flags after 4 years of dating will be same red flags 10 years later but by then they’ll become red banners.

Whatever is this guy’s agenda he makes a lot of sense. There are red flags, major incompatibility, he points it out because he knows it will not get better. He wants to break up. Convincing him otherwise is a waste of time and a bit degrading in my opinion.

No need to have ugly break ups but wise thing is to separate, and see where it goes, look for fulfilling career and other ways to enrich your life. Become strong independent self-supporting woman with goals and dreams and happy life (and is able to make decisions).

Then find right man. This man might be great but this isn’t “happily ever after”. Relationship don’t suppose to be that hard and sad. If years later you two want to try again (unlikely but it happens), you can try again.