So fun story time...after I took my son to the bus stop this am my mother stops me and says “you need help”. Yeah obviously (I think she though I was drunk). Anyway she basically kidnaps me and take me to her church to speak to the pastor, or lectures me for forty minutes about god’s plan in my life and that maybe it is bipolar, but it’s likely Satan’s influence over my mind. I have to push Satan away by repenting and accepting Jesus and only then will I be healed.

I mean...I really tried to keep a straight face and no offense to anyone here who believes, but...really? Bipolar can be cured because it’s just Satan influencing me? Riiiiight.

I might take that more seriously if my mom were a happy person but she’s miserable. She’s also just waiting to die so she can go to heaven. Sooooo...yeah. That was my morning.

Then I drove to my SIL house praying not to get pulled over bc I knew they would ping me as under the influence because of all the stupid Ativan.

I’m here at my therapists office and not sure how things are going to go. I feel better than yesterday because I’m STILL STONED sixteen hours later. But when I say I don’t care, I truly don’t care. I just want this hell to be over, I’d that means overtaking Ativan till the lamictal kicks in then there it is.

Some people
Mentioned contacting pdoc - she is out of office until May 1. No way to reach her. Not sure if there’s anothe pdoc who could see me in an emergency.