I'm sorry you woke up feeling so bad, shame is a terrible emotion to feel. It seems like a good thing to me that part of you wanted help and caring, and told him the truth, and he called you at 9pm and you did get that care. That feels like a positive part of the story.
I'm sure your T would see these behaviors as something you're suffering from and are obviously not to blame for. I was thinking eating disorders are pretty common so I googled and this popped up from a very large British study:
Quote:
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By mid-life, 15.3% (95% confidence intervals, 13.5–17.4%) of women had met criteria for a lifetime ED. The 12-month prevalence of EDs was 3.6%. Childhood sexual abuse was prospectively associated with all binge/purge type disorders....
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That says to me it's common and it's sometimes a result of abuse in childhood, and I would think that's more how a T would think of it. That this is something you suffer from, not a "stupid" thing you do. I hope he can help you feel less shame or embarrassment.
