Well, it's a waste of my time and energy. He's mentally ill, and not self-aware. I highly doubt he wants to be, and if he were, he doesn't want to go to therapy in the first place. And I've heard therapy can make his disorder worse, so. Everything for him is motivated by a need for attention, sympathy, or to look good. If he couldn't stop lying and cheating for women he professed to love, he wasn't going to do it for me. He's never going to not be this way.

I've made peace with the fact that nothing was real; everything was a lie, and pretty much everything out of his mouth is a lie. I was ego supply for him, and that is it. It's not my fault, it says nothing about who I am, it just is what it is. And he's no longer my problem to have to deal with. It must suck for him to have to deal with the tornado in his head every single day of his life, and the complete void where his heart should be. I understand that total, life-sucking loneliness that is an un-checked, cluster B personality disorder, especially since ours fit together like two ugly interlocking hands. I kind of feel sorry for him. Just not too sorry.

Sorry for hijacking your thread. Back to regular programming.