I'm sorry you're hurting. Wanting to die is a familiar feeling when I'm depressed. I wouldn't kill myself, but at times I wouldn't mind if it happened.

What saves me is I don't know if this is the only life we get. If it is, then I better try to make the best of it. Otherwise, there's no telling what I might miss.

Remember a time when you weren't under such stress. It can happen again.

My mom is also not very encouraging. She causes me more heartache than anyone else, so I know what you mean. I tell myself that she doesn't know any better (and no wonder I grew up to be so depressed). Sometimes I tell her when she's making me feel worse.

I hope these words help you. Please take care of yourself.