Quote:
Originally Posted by Olive303
Yes, that is so true, every job is a learning experience and helpful towards something else you want to do. If anything knowing that you don't like it is helpful enough. For example, when I first started my job it was exactly what I was looking for. I desired a job doing exactly what I am doing for a while but when I actually got to do it myself I realized how much I dislike it. It didn't take long to realize this either. Even in my job there are parts that I do like doing and that is where the value comes in. I have learned a lot of new things in my role. I also know I could use these skills and apply them to another job I may be better suited for. It is a long process and sometimes frustrating when you don't know what you want. Thank you for reassuring me that it is normal to not be sure. I always feel that stress and pressure of not knowing because I want to be working towards something.
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In what you have shared so far, I see a young woman who most definitely strives toward goals and has done things even her own family has not done.
I respect the fact that even though you experience strong minded and somewhat controlling individuals, you don't just cower and give in. I don't really see you as "stuck", instead I see you as an individual who is exploring how you feel about things, that you do respect how others feel and yet you are not going to give into what others want, especially when it comes to a commitment for your life.
Also, yes, you are right in that taking the time to ask this question and read through the responses of others that might challenge you can help you gain skills in defining yourself. Also you are learning how "yes" sometimes others assume things about you that are not really correct. By taking the time to clarify yourself, you are actually learning because you are using what you "do know" thus far to direct the conversation towards getting some feedback that can give you more food for thought and growth. Also, IMHO, you don't have to "know" what you actually want in terms of career and marriage etc. It really is NORMAL at your age to not quite "know" yet. When you don't know, its best to "not" make decisions that are major commitments and embrace your effort to keep "learning and growing" instead. Actually, as I have mentioned, you have been doing just that up until now and as you have shared, you have learned and grown a lot right?
Your partner is still only half way towards actually being a doctor, well, he has not actually practiced and he too may find he doesn't like his career choice. He should not be making a commitment right now either IMHO. Also, it's really not unusual for a couple to get to a point where they actually grow apart too. It's understandable that you are not ready to put yourself and your own growth aside where you give into what "he" wants or doesn't want.
I think that as you have spent time discussing this challenge here, you have been gaining on your decision to hold off on making a commitment, you realize you are not ready and you want to explore different options in both your career and relationship, THAT IS OK. I don't think this means "stuck" either.