Thank you for the replies. It just confirmed what i already knew. He has apologized and wants to come back home and i don't know what to tell him. He doesn't even usually apologize. He even admitted that what he's done and said was wrong. (Which was shocking to hear from him) But I feel like if i just give in and let him come home and make up, he will just repeat this behavior. But i do love him and want him home. So i am torn at the moment.
I told him i don't want him to come home. That what he's doing is abuse and basically what all of you have been saying. He agreed with me actually but wants to come home. It's hard to stay mad when he's being nice but i know that if i don't stick to my guns he will just end up doing it again.
And for the record, this isn't something that happens daily or weekly. This is once every few months. He will blow up and talk to me like that. However, he should NEVER speak to me like that and he needs to somehow realize this. I'm going to insist on counseling. And if he won't go, I'll go alone. And if he does this again, I'll just be single. That's just the way it's going to have to be. You guys are right. I don't deserve this and i do deserve better.