You are in my thoughts salsharia! It’s a tough place to be for sure.
I like these kinds of groups for growth. There are other online sobriety groups. Women for sobriety is one I tried a few years ago. I’ve heard great things about smart recovery, never tried it.
I tried AA. I was never comfortable with speaking up. On the rare times I did speak, I felt really disconnected from the group. My social anxiety kept me from trying again. I might try it again one day. I did enjoy the speaker groups at AA.
For me, alcohol use has caused so much damage. I can’t be the happy social drinker I always wanted to be. No matter how many times I try it again, the outcome is the same. Maybe if I try really hard in the beginning, I can put my phone away and listen to music, and be chill. But that never lasts.
It’s painful to feel real emotion while sober. But it’s worth it, and a step in healing. We are here to help one another. I’m here for you. Xo
Sans