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mtd said:
The memory keeps coming back to you and you haven't been able to dismiss it. Plus, it's very specific. Please understand that children often suppress or "forget" traumatic memories and feelings. It's a defense mechanism. The memories and feelings can return years later when your psyche is ready to address them. When that happens, you need to address them and work to heal from the lingering pain.

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(((((kaika)))))
this is a really tough position to be in. I agree totally with what mtd said, as that is EXACTLY what I am going through now. I have tried to deny these memories for the past...nearly 18months... but am being to realise that it is as mtd said- very specific, recurring, and probably for a good reason.
If you have any questions or need to talk or PM someone please feel free to PM me. I would like to help you in your journey, especially becoz I am there right now. All the best.