Wow, what a conundrum.

First, I think you judge yourself too harshly. You said, "...but I didn't manage well at all." You did. Yes, you cried in the bathroom, but that's okay and healthy. And you said you were new to these types of calls. PLUS you have social anxiety--I"d say you managed very well then.

You also judge how others see you...."leads me to think I'm boring to others"... you, me, none of us know what other folks are thinking...and it is usually our fears we are projecting onto them... I invite you to cancel those type thoughts when they pop up in your head. Tell yourself, "I don't really know what they think; and I'll remain open."

As for asking for help. Asking is fine, if you don't ask you surely won't get help. If you ask for help, you 'may' get help (its not 100% guaranteed), but not asking--it is 100% certified that you will not get help.

Folks on the phone who take stuff out on you---that is ALL about them and their poor impulse control, their displaced anger, their low EQ. Know that it is not in ANY WAY about you.

And be kind to yourself during this stressful time. In your time off give yourself some treats, bubble-baths with candles, a new (happy) cd. Reward yourself for persevering.