I also feel this way much of the time. I feel paranoid about many things on many different levels. I do know of the experience of paranoia and anger.

For me the entire Mental Illness thing consumes me. I argue with myself about communication and in the most do not do so. Fear of so many things feeling caught and trapped in the middle of so many different diagnosis' that I no longer even know who or what I am. Or who or what I have become. I am definatly paranoid alot.

Also, as I take meds and even seen my Therapist today in which I let know that my own paranoia has shut me off from the outside world and now aghoraphobic in my home sitting here in the dark I too not in chat as I am unable to go there only on the forum itself, wonder if there are people from my past out there in here spying on me. Doing some type of stalking and keeping me from posting and so much so, that between ptsd and bi polar, ADD, and personality of whatever it is I have or am is so much unclear to me.

This for me the paranoia of not knowing or not being able to really know what is going on in my own mind in my own world and so much so not even aware of the 'outside' .

Being my T today began to talk to me of something about the thousands surrounding me not having power due to a major storm here. As she talked to me and told me things I heard only that of a foreign language being spoken to me.

When she finished I told her that honestly I or my mind would not and did not hear the words she had just spoke as they to me were all jumbled up and foreign and I told her with real tears in my eyes how badly I did indeed want to hear what she had said it all by my mind was not processed and feared it was some sort of psychosis and schizophrenia.

Only she told me it was nothing of the sort. She said to me it is just I am going through so much in my own world my own self and lack of that I am unable to really focus on things which do not directly affect me. She said that right now I am distressed and paranoid as I am trying to figure myself out and that does not make me psychotic only means I have alot going on in my m ind.

I don't know I just thought I would try and say how it (paranoia) effects me and how it is going and that Your not alone.

Take Care,