Arrrgh... that’s the only way I can describe how I’m feeling right now!!!!!!!

Each morning I wake up at around 6:45. This is definitely an improvement from before, when I used to wake up at 8am.

However, it’s usually with a sense of anxiety and dread that makes it hard to focus / get anything done all day.

I was feeling good because 2 weeks ago I found 2 areas that interested me greatly: foreign languages and education. It’s been hard though - at a high level, it seemed reassuring. This would be a fresh start, and a change from my previous industry – financial services.

However, I now find myself stuck in “analysis paralysis.” I spend all day poring over articles on education and foreign language interpretation. Great information, but I feel no closer to landing a job. Also, I get easily distracted; once I start applying for a job I think, “I wonder what’s going on over at Facebook or Twitter.” Then two hours go by - I'm tired and worn out but no closer to achieving what I’d set out to do.

I’ve also met with some folks in the industry. I feel these discussions are meaningless, however, since I don’t have a clear sense of what I can do in this field.

Again, I’m glad that I’m waking up early, and that I have at least a rough idea of what I want to do. This Bipolar disorder and ADHD is making it very difficult to move forward, but I will continue “fighting the good fight.”