I am in the midst of a lot of pain and turmoil about this issue, so I know I am quite biased. But from this thread so far, it seems like many clients do a decent job of recognizing a T's incompetence when that is the case, though some of us may have wished we had stopped sooner with some T's. (When we have been hurt by an inept T, like nextstep mentioned, it's not clear the T ever realized their incompetence.)

When the therapist decides they are not competent, based on this thread so far, it is more likely to be harmful to the client than helpful, to put it mildly. In fact it seems to be a bit of a "go-to" excuse when therapists feel overwhelmed or uneasy in a relationship with a client, or fear getting in trouble with colleagues, and want out of it. But again -- my personal feelings are running rampant here.

What I'm not seeing much of -- and I haven't in my couple of years on the forum -- is a story that goes "I was seeing a T and it wasn't really working that well, so they said we needed to stop and they recommended a few other therapists. I went to see one and it was so much better. I'm really glad I was referred."

Hopefully some of us have had that happy story, but it's rare in comparison with the client having to recognize the incompetence themselves, or the T being incredibly destructive in abandoning someone.