I have read some of your posts and can see that your mood seems to be indicating ocd and low mood; I hope you manage to speak to a professional if you haven’t already because it’s the bravest thing you can do when you feel like this and it can help a lot! Don’t leave it until it gets worse because getting help quickly means your more likely to recover. Everyone has bad days even people without mental health issues - I think feeling numb is when you get to a point because you’ve been feeling sad about the same thing for too long (: I hope you find someone to help you and you start to feel better!