Thank all of you for your responses.

I will try giving it another thought – maybe it is my negative internal voice that's still fighting its way out. I want to be in peace with myself – and this could be just a defense mechanism. That might be a manifest of a fixation, and facing-then-accepting it will give me another chance to let go. Mouse_62 – I'm glad to hear your T helped you change and grow out from your mother voice berating you. Good job for finding the strength, awareness and will within you to work your way out of the pattern.

It could be a stepping-stone on my way. The talking in my head does keep me involved in the process. WarmFuzzySocks, Thalassophie & CHickenNoodleSoup – thank you for your words. They give me a different perspective and hope that I will evolve through and from the situation. The thought of ending the therapy (came across my mind because it came up one session) left me with a feeling of discomfort that I'll find myself - only with myself and with the conversations, which then would feel less natural, more lonely, empty and pointless. I'll try to use my current situation to find a way-to-connect that settles with me, and will also give things time to take their place naturally. Meanwhile, it is helpful to perceive it as a way to channel my thoughts.

I can dwell into the thoughts, and yes, even enjoy them, but this accompanied with some guilt and sense that something is wrong with me – that there is something not capable about me. It's comforting in a way to know that others experience this too.

I am not trying to fight the thoughts off, I want to find a state of mind that feels centered.

Trying meditation and yoga is a good advice (!). I have intrusive thoughts now and then and I find yoga to be very helpful in distracting the mind for a while and sustaining it relaxed.

White dove – in case you want to share more, what does it mean for you to experience pre-occupation with your T? what kind of thoughts did you have? To me it also feels like a distraction at times. is that the only reason why you see it as a negative side effect? Did it have any good impact on you?

MoxieDoxie – What do you feel about the things you've describes? Does it bother you? If it does, I encourage you to (in your own pace) bring it up in therapy. Even starting the share from the reason why you don't bring it up…