I always feel as though my life is a waste. It never really goes away. I've been out of work for going on two years, I contribute nothing to society and I'm kind of a waste pf space because of it.

Recently, I've started combating how I feel. I figure I'm spending all of this time to work on myself and make myself mentally healthy (at the very least stable). In doing this, I'm strengthening myself so that once I get through all of this (if I ever do) I can help people through their own pain. Instead of doing what I do now, which is encourage people to keep fighting as I'm on the verge of giving up myself; I will be able to show people that it's possible to get better. I'm not "wasting time", I'm buying time 'til I reach the ocean's surface, swim to shore, get a boat, go back and start pulling people aboard who are still out their.