Perna after all these years of therapy, my husbands depression is still uncontrolled. He is still behavioraly and emotionaly doing the same things that cause strife in our marriage. I've tried so hard to change myself to alter the situation, but I feel like I am spinning my wheels and no matter what I do for myself, my kids, the marriage, his depression always ruins it.

Like I said, I have tried so hard to change my own attitude towards things, to be supportive rather than enabling, to take care of myself and the kids, to focus on the positive rather than the negative, to not take things personally, to respond rather than react....yet nothing I have done is making this better. No matter what, my husbands issues always take precident and overshadow our lives.

Most recently has been his incessant foisting of blame on me for his depression and his failures. The most recent being my causing the lack of relationship with his family. (which has been dysfunctional his entire life. He has never had a relationship with his parents or his siblings so how this is my fault is beyond me)

I think I'm just trying to wrap my head around the fact that I have reached the end of my road. That I can't deal with this anymore. That he isn't going to change. That our marriage is never going to offer me the security and comfort that I had hoped all these years for.

I hate this.