So I invited my son out to lunch to try to have some peace and civility in the house until he leaves. He spent the entire drive back literally screaming at me while I was driving that I should apologize for how I treated him yesterday. I did go up to his room to try to get him out of bed before noon and then in the afternoon I lost my cool with him because he was just lying in bed doing nothing. I feel terrible and wish I never let him back into my house. I am wondendring if I am starting to decompensate. Anyway I'll see my pdoc this afternoon. Definitely no more weed for me today. It's tough to be yelled at constantly being called names. He said his relationship is good with everyone else except me so I asked him why did he want to come home, because I didn't want him at home because I was afraid it would lead to this. I still don't understand why he's here. I'm thinking of giving away my cat and checking into the hospital. I couldn't trust my son to take care of the cat and the lady who sometimes helps tme is still away on vacation. If my pdoc says I need to go in, I really don't know what i will do.