I do agree with a lot of what others are saying.
Trust has been broken. But its not just trust relating to porn.
It does go deeper.
In order to watch porn, or to do anything planned for that matter, thought has to go into it. For instance, he has had a desire or thought about sex. Then he has started acting on that thought. It didn't happen spontaneous, his urge might have been, but he then thought about how to achieve his desire. For instance, he could have asked you. He decided not to. Then he removed himself from you, 'hiding' his activity, something he has had to think about, then act on.
He thought before he acted. He had a decision.
Coming from a person who's gone through two divorces, both spouses cheating on me, thr first signs of trouble started with an emotional disconnection on their part. Which was filled with someone else. That happens gradually. Porn, no matter who you are, mentally disconnects you from your partner. In those moments you are enjoying watching someone else, and gratifying, rewarding yourself whilst watching. That mental disconnection soon becomes an emotional disconnection, as his mind now knows it can get the same satisfaction without you. How many people have sex, but think about someone else whilst doing it?
Your mind is probably asking...."is he?"
Trust broken.
Now its only a matter of opportunity. Let's say the porn he was watching was of your next door neighbor? Would you trust him not to act on that? No. Why. The desire is there, its a proven. But now the opportunity is there as well. And you'd be paranoid. Well I would.
I can only speak from experience so go ahead and shoot me down. But this is already affecting your marriage. Others have suggested pulling back, pulling away to save your pain. You won't change him unless he wants to change, even if for him its turned into an addiction. There's still help. But if you pull away, that makes it easier for him, he becomes more detached, and around the vicious cycle goes. Until one day, the fantasy of someone else becomes better than you. Or even worse, can be, is stuck in a lonely emotionally void relationship.
It all needs to come out into the open. No threats of therapy or marriage counselling, those decisions you make together. But if its hurting you, you don't ignore it . You dont ignore pain. Pain exists as a warning. Physically, mentally, emotionally. Your in pain. He needs to recognize that, HOW IT MAKES YOU FEEL and then work on a solution together. A healthy sex life has nothing to do with emotional connection or his commitment to making your relationship work. He is ultimately selfish.
Marriages stay together for financial, for the kids, as examples. But theyre not happy ones. The goal of staying together is to please each other. Its that emotional connection that keeps bonds strong. Think of others who have long term relationships...what keeps friends together, best friends together, marriage mates together....isn't it that emotional bond or connection. And when things do come up, argurments etc. Isn't it through recognition of the hurt, wanting to repair, and then being willing to working together that saves and strengthens those relationships?
I'm sorry for your pain. Don't ignore it though. It'll only get worse. Fix it whilst its still small enough that it can be fixed.
(((Hugs))))