I don't feel any good right now. Quite scared in fact.

The world is scaring me. I can't hide and that's even more frightening.

I have a dinner tonight, with people I feel don't like my company (who does? ). I feel very unwelcomed.

Tomorrow I have a course with the same people.

For both situations I need a drive, because I don't have a car. I feel I am a burden to ride with. I am sure I am, I am dull and the opposite of spontaneous, they look for fun. I can't keep up the pace.

For the dinner I am thinking about calling a cab. I really feel I am not welcomed.
S really ignored me today. As I said, I am dull, not spontaneous, emotionally distant. I am not a fan of her personality, but I treat her as anybody else. She just ignored me today, I reached to her and she barely looked at me scrolling down her phone, she barely answered to my questions only with short answers and she immediately left to go socialize with somebody else. I can't ask her for a ride.

But everybody likes her so it's me. And she is warm and familiar with everybody.