My T is an alternative therapist, that is she isn´t educated to treat conditions like depression and anxiety. She´s a psychosynthesis therapist and here they aren´t allowed to practise within mental health care and I see her at a church where she partly works as a therapist.

I knew this from the beginning and she has known from the beginning that I´ve struggled to get psychotherapy within mental health care but I was just given supportive counselling from a nurse.

I have suicide thoughts from time to time and I often feel hopelessness. I've never tried to kill myself but I feel I need to speak about that I many times find life hopeless. I also have several rather common but still big issues to talk about like loneliness, unemployment and intimacy issues.

I´m constantly afraid that my therapist will just suddenly state that she can´t support me any more. I´m not expecting a treatment but I have nobody but her to talk to about my issues and I´m afraid she´ll think she can´t spend unlimited time on me as she can´t treat depression.

But to me she´s important even if she can´t really treat depression, I´m not even sure what would even if I met with a "real" psychotherapist. I also were in psychodynamic therapy a couple of years ago with a "real" T and that didn´t help me anything.

I don´t want to question my T about this as she has already here and there said that she´s limited in what she can do, but I do worry about it.

What had you others done in this situation?