sorry i didn't reply sepiida, you're definitely right. update time.

over the weekend we went out with a big group of friends to this bar. cinco de mayo and all, there were a lot of tequila shots. we get back to his place, properly wasted. i'm exhausted from dancing and wandering the area, so i get my makeup off and head straight for bed. he comes with me and starts trying to fool around, but i'm genuinely feeling so nauseous and tired i don't have it in me to even pretend to enjoy it. so i politely ask if we can raincheck it until the morning. he doesn't respond, just sits up and i can hear him doing these irritated sighs for a few minutes. finally he says something like, "we both know you're not going to want to in the morning either." and in this tone like i've betrayed him, like i'm deliberately depriving him of something life-saving. i tried to reverse course just to avoid a fight and just said fine, go ahead, it's fine. hard no from him. he left to go get food somewhere and it took everything in me to just stay still in bed without going to the kitchen and mutilating myself.

so yeah. really can't take this much longer. :^)

(also one of our girl friends almost, almost was gonna make out with me in a very 2008 katy perry For The Giggles And Attention way and uh, that was much more exciting than anything else all night/week/month/year hoowhee)