He isn't going to go. He was in therapy, but it was mainly relating to his over use of alcohol (something I could benefit from too but can't afford it). I wanted to go with him, and he was very into it but not for the right reasons. He wanted me to have my "lying" problem under control and talk to the therapist about why I feel the need to be so dishonest. The thing is, I am not. He twists things and makes up odd reasons as to why I am "dishonest". Like the tip thing. I said I saw 6.22 listed as a base tip on the receipt so I tipped 7 and he said that I was saying I left 6 and i'm a liar. He creates this fantasy lies in his head. I wouldn't admit that I did it on purpose, i'm a liar. I can't stop lying because I don't know what he's going to turn into a "lie".

He has admitted he "doesn't handle things properly" sometimes but he is generally 85% likely to blame me in situations. Even when he admits he doesn't handle things properly, a few months later when he retells the story it will be twisted to make me seem like I am at fault for the situation and he was merely reacting to my absurd and violent behavior. My "violent" behavior is me reacting to being cursed at and screamed at.

His brain just seems so hard wired into thinking "It's not ME, it's HER, she causes me to act like this!"

I remember several months back we left a parade early because I was apparently so tired I was falling all over the place and couldn't keep my eyes open. He does this a lot, he will make up some outlandish over exaggeration as to how I was behaving and that he some how swooped me up and saved the day. I was at a concert with him once and had my eyes closed and was listening to the music. Apparently according to him I was swaying all over and about to faint. K. But anyway, when we got back from the parade he started cursing at me saying how he was pissed we missed it, it was all my fault, and that since all I want to do is have sex he was going to give it to me. He pulled his penis out and grabbed my head.

I informed him that it was sexual assault. Apparently I lied about the entire incident, we were having a great time and I was laughing because I thought it was funny. News to me. It's like he thinks he can behave however he wants with no consequences. I told my friends about that and they all said they'd have stabbed his penis and GTFO. I am so tempted when he brings it up and says I am going to get him arrested for false charges to tell him that he needs to see what it is really like to date a REAL drug addict, a REAL liar, a REAL person who wants to see harm come to their partner. They exist. I've read about women who bash their heads against walls and call the police and say their husband did it. Women who make REAL false rape charges.

Not me.

He's lucky that I've never actually taken real action against anything that he has done. He would get ripped a new asshole by a DV judge for his behavior. But I don't want to do that. I don't want harm to come to him. If it comes to the point I have to leave I will just leave.