I a way it sounds you are and have beein interested in meeting new people and chatting as you were open meeting him and find chatting pleasant. Maybe it is possible to move this realization into the real world and find someone to chit chat with over coffee or something. There are more interesting and kind people around too. And leave therapy for more therapy issues, in case you want to do any work? You don't sound very happy with things how they are and even though change can be scary, it sounds you have a desire to change things.