So last year I was just browsing a dating site....just having fun, life was great, all was well.... everything was in place and perfect. Then she sends me a message..... of course she is gorgeous, very attractive, 7 years my senior. Although.... no job, no vehicle, a three year old, living at her parents. Hmmmmm......

Apparently recently divorced from a crack head that smoked away literally everything they had. So there were many many late night phone calls that went on for hours and hours. I finally meet her in person, she is very pretty and attractive. I have a past with drug/alcohol abuse, the first thing she does is offer me adderall. Red flags everywhere, thrown from one end of the room to the next. We hang out a little that night and I even drink after being abstinent for about 4 months. We had fun. So the phone conversations continue, being she had no transportation and a two year old at that time, it was mostly phone conversations that would go on until daylight.

Anyway, I end up falling for the girl......intuition in my gut telling me no, the whole time.I ignore like a typical person with susbstance abuse issues throughout life. She gets pregnant within two months, she decides to terminate, I left it up to her and told her I would support her either way although I was excited and wanted to go through the pregnancy.

Fast forward, one of the very first things I tell her about me is I can work through anything with you as long as you are honest and fatihful. IF you can do those two things we can get through anything. Soon i started catching little lies here and there, she guarded her phone like it was the Presidents top secret nuclear codes or something.

Gut - intuition told me everything. When there was an argument and I would try to leave she would guilt trip saying I promised to never leave her and her daughter. Manipulation to the core.

So we move in together, by this time I am being eaten hop inside so bad because I know there are lie and things being hidden from me. She wouldn’t even bring her computer to our house. I even asked her if If she would get it so I could use it for a work here and there, she refused.

Arguments started happening, rage was coming out of me because I knew I was being lied to and things were being hidden and every time I tried to confront she would act stupid and change the subject in such a manipulative way, it was crazy. I would leave and buy alcohol just to calm me a bit. Mind you a two almost three year old is witnessing all of this.

Eventually I was able to make her leave. She has a phone on my plan that I bought her, iPhone, so not inexpensive. I asked for it back, she would never give it back so I filed an insurance claim and had the phone replaced. I had to break into my own phone in order to sale it. Holy ***** at what I found in that phone she guiardes so closely. I am 43 years old and I have never been so betrayed and dealt with such dishonesty in my life. Of course it was would crushing and the truth started coming outl. Mind you a year goes by and I always felt as I never really meant anything to this woman. She never came to visit unless she was getting something whether it be a meal or fuel for a vehicle I had purchased for her. Other than that it was like pulling teeth to get her to visit.

Anyway, turns out the truth was she was still in love with her ex that emotionally, physically, sexually, mentally, and any other way that can be done abused her. Made her allow him to put things in her she didn’t want, made her have sex with people outside their marriage, I mean just the sickest of sick abuse you could imagine. Really messed messed her mind up.

I think I am finally getting some relief and on the other side of it. She is just as a rotten individual as I have ever come across and I have know some not very good people at all.

Not certain why I had the urge to type all of this however I did find this site while looking for relief of the pain from what I had experienced.

Oh...... forgot to mention that life went from perfect to just a mess and picking up pieces of things that were destroyed throughout this relationship such as esteem, confidence, self awareness, personal relationships, my career has been affected. This kind of stuff touches every aspect of life. I am far from a doctor however she has posted on FB that she suffers from CPSTD and it is sometimes masked by NPD. It’s like whatever, your a cuckoo bird and you are going to have a miserable life and I feel for angry man that so much as even likes you enough to try and date you.