Ah thats a nice city...glad you are back in your own place. Have a friend & his wife that moved there from here a few years ago. Don't get there often but met one of the owners of the Paul Sawyer art studio there & have been trying for a few years to get there.

Spent 3 hours on the road monday night picking up a friend at L-ville airport who lives in Perryville....long drive round trip. Can't believe how I avoid cities after growing up & living 54 years in Los Angeles. My peaceful little farm is definitely my retreat. Hiking in my woods & climbing around the slopes is my escape but love the trails at Shaker Village or Eagles Nest on horse or on foot surrounded by nature (& BUGS).

Wish I could say I didn't understand your feeling of being ready to die before getting out of your marriage but I felt that was the last 13 years I was living with my H until I escaped to here & actually tried way too many times as a way out before I found a real one. The thought of having to interface with him again in the near future & wanting to make sure I act civil is very stressful. This time glad I have a good lawyer on my side & actually have people on my side now who defended his behaviors before now but it will be a challenge wrapping up all those lose ends I walked away from 11 years ago.....celebraring my 11 years here may 15.

I think that sick to the stomach feel & even getting sick is probably a more normal feel than you imagine.