My grandmother died unexpectedly from sepsis after having surgery. It happened 12 years ago but I always think about her when a milestone comes up. I know she would have been proud of what her grandkids accomplished but I still get upset knowing how much she missed. And because she died due to surgery I would have severe anxiety anytime I heard someone was having surgery. I worried that they would die soon after like my grandma did. I have worked on this year but I still get nervous about people getting surgery and I don't stop worrying until they are sent home. I am still sad that she never met my husband. I know they would have enjoyed each other's company and she would have been happy for both of us.

My grandfather passed recently and his death was somewhat expected as he had been battling cancer for years. He originally had CLL and early this year we are still not sure what happened but he got lung cancer (I don't know if he smoked) and it spread to his bones. My mom told me that we should prepare ourselves for the inevitable but until recently it looked like he was beating it. I bought him seeds for his birthday so he could garden one more time. Sadly his death came quick. We knew it was coming but we thought we had more time. I helped my family take care of him in hospice and he died with family around him at home. I was able to tell him one last time I loved him and that I was here for him. I am sad that he is gone but know ing I didn't have any unfinished business and that he didn't have any it seemed okay. He's gardening on a higher plane of existence right now. I am going to miss him very much but I feel more okay with it because I had time to say goodbye and be with him.