I do not mean “use” in a negative way (i.e. being manipulative for their own gain), but rather use as a type of countertransference. For example feeling maternal/paternal towards clients in such a way that some of their parental/nurturing desires are partially fulfilled.

I was reading an article recently in which the author claimed that the therapeutic relationship often resembles the parent/child relationship and it got me thinking about this. My own therapist sometimes acts paternal (a couple of weeks ago he even referred to himself as a sort of “parent” in relation to me). I guess it’s human nature for dormant parental feelings to come out in therapy, especially when the client experiences child like transference. For me, it’s been very healing because it allows me to experience both a healthy adult/adult relationship and a healthy parent/child one (which I lacked and terribly missed as a kid). I’d love to know if therapist’s gain anything from these dynamics (another article suggested that there’s no transference without counterteansference, it’s never one sided).