BTW— I took a look at the offerings on a dating site and that always triggers me to run back to my husband. Dear God, do I have to start dating some new guy who doesn’t turn me on and irritates the crap out of me? No thanks.

I am so upset with myself for not just being able to deal with my h, look the other way, find others to fulfill me, whatever works.

Yes, I have been 100% happier in these past few months. I am not crying or depressed any more. I just need to focus on that. Baby steps.