I was hurt badly and then abandoned by my 1st T. The very first person I disclosed my trauma to, etc.... I did NOT think I would survive it nor did I think I could ever 'move on' with another T and learn to trust build a relationship and all that to do the work I needed to do.

I'm 6 years from that experience and on my 3rd T. Did the pain go away? Yes, it does. Do the effects of what happened still impact me? Yes, but less and less. What happened is more like a scar now. If that specific place gets rubbed (triggered) a little too much, then yes, it still hurts. But instead of becoming a huge, gushing wound again it just stings for a bit and then goes away. I don't know if I will ever be 'over' it, but the impact continues to lessen as I let myself trust my T and even more than that I have experiences that show me that my T is not like my first T.

I'm sorry you are facing this. It's SO HARD. Please know it does get a bit better with time. I hope the 'time' is short for you.