It's tough because he seems to be adjusting to the attachment stuff you want to work on, but it seems like you're leading rather than following. I would find that really stressful. My T works from a relationship/development framework to begin with, so she could not possibly be more comfortable with all these intense, uncomfortable attachment things that come up for me. But I would feel really rejected if I had to constantly explain them to her and get her used to them. The whole point is that I'm learning that close relationships can be good and healing and that my feelings (no matter how intense and "bad") are okay. Maybe this T can help you get there; I just don't know. It seems like his cluelessness kind of throws you into a panic spiral sometimes, though, and that seems really unpleasant.