This reminds me of when i first started seeing current t, and i brought him a bag of (uncooked) steel cut oatmeal. He later told me it was delicious, that it lowered his cholesterol, and that it changed his life. I was like, does this mean we have to get married now? Cuz really, i didnt know what it MEANT.

My family never let me have any effect on them, at least not that they showed me. I never felt like i contributed, mattered, etc. Only that i was a disappointment, an impediment, a bother, a weight.

So my "relationship" with my t has partly been about my presence just being acknowledged. Maybe appreciated? Idk.