Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyffani
Thank you. Your response brought some tears to my eyes. I didn't think anyone else really felt this way. People say they feel lonely.. but this feels so much deeper than that, you know.. I hope you are able to regain even just a little ambition to connect again. I feel like going through this makes me just want to see everyone happy and okay.. I know it sounds silly.. but no one should feel this way alone... At least that's what I feel.
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You aren't alone in feeling this way. And this really does feel a lot deeper than loneliness.
It's really bad with me: Since my BPD diagnosis a year ago, I've sort of decided to accept being isolated... I've decided that the only way to save people from being emotionally hurt by me was to distance myself from others. I think this hurts so much because I feel like the only way to prevent hurting others is by hurting myself emotionally instead. (*** Everyone tells me this is a fairly common reaction to the initial diagnosis but that I'll change my mind later on. Considering I've never learned to put myself first, not unless it becomes psychosomatic and it literally endangers my life, something tells me this idea is going to be around for quite some time....)
Regardless, saying "this sucks" about the show we put on daily is a severe understatement. I always say that life shouldn't have to be this way, there must be some sort of a fix for it, so now it's just a matter of finding the fix.