I'm sorry that you can relate. Yes, he has tried to contact me, but I've never replied. I don't want to check anymore, too.
I'm not sure if I'm still obsessing, but even if I was, it's surely not in the 'i-want-him-back" kind of way. I don't easily let go of the past, even if I'm walking away from it, especially if there is a sort of inconclusive situation... I'm not good with words, I hope you see what I'm trying to say. ;;;
I wasn't really gas lighted by him; at that time I didn't even know what was a toxic relationship. Now I'm able to see all the red flags (sometimes even when they're not there; thank you, paranoia), thanks to him and some research, that made me bring up my question. I really didn't know that something like that could happen...

I'm so sorry it was abusive. I wouldn't wish that on anybody. Even though I don't know the story, I support you and hope you are okay now.