I've done like Cyrano only I've gone a bit differently and got books out of the library on suicide and paid attention to what I was thinking as I was reading them. That helped me understand what the thoughts did for me (provided a "bottom" to that black hole, somewhere to stand that was "safe" (the thoughts are safe because I'm not really going to suicide, but who knows how depressed or crazy/"lost" I might get?)). I was using the thoughts as building materials until I could replace them with "normal" thoughts that were better for me.