I had mental health problems when I was a teenage living with family . It was undiagnosed at that time . I'm so sorry you are going through all this . I remember how hard it was . I was scared of my mum too . And I hated my step dad. He was horrible . My brother was mean too . The good news is you will be old enough one day to seek the help you need but that doesn't help you now and you do need help now. My heart goes out to you because I remember how hard it was for me too
Quote:
Originally Posted by eelsauces
My mom caught me doing something other than schoolwork on my computer just a minute ago. I don't think she saw what I was doing - looking for online counselors - but she knows something is up.
I think I may be experiencing Complex PTSD, including what I realized are emotional flashbacks. I just want help. I just want to find help and they're taking it away more and more. Do they want me to die? I don't know what's real, I just want to know what reality is but they've taken it away from me and I can't trust myself so for all I know I'm overreacting.
I should be happy when I hear the dog coming down the stairs. I should be happy. I shouldn't be afraid, but I am because that dog only comes down when mom comes down. I shouldn't be afraid of her. But I'm so afraid of her, I'm afraid of both of them. I shouldn't keep seeing her coming around the corner when nobody's there. I shouldn't hear his voice when it's a car engine revving instead. I shouldn't default to getting nervous when I get a text but I do, because maybe it's them telling me that I'm in trouble again, that I did something wrong without realizing it. God, someone get me out of here.
|