Quote:
Originally Posted by atisketatasket
LT—his big thing is sports psychology, right? That’s a very goal-oriented field (like, teach an athlete how not to choke at the big moments or think too much instead of operating on instinct—and I think that could be quite helpful applied to you even as a non-athlete).
So I am wondering if some of this could be reframed with that in mind? For instance, judgment/shame. It’s really your feeling, so it’s kind of like the feeling a pitcher might have after giving up a homer or a tennis player after making an unforced error and they let that throw them off their game. It’s really you who is judging yourself and the feeling is throwing you off your game.
I feel like I’m not making much sense, but I think you’re talking to him as though he were a more traditional talk therapist than is my sense of him. “Meet me where I’m at” is a very common talk therapy phrase, for instance.
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Yep, sport psychology and also teens/young adults. And couples. His list of specialties may as well have said "Everyone except LonesomeTonight" (as I told him in an early session, I'm like the opposite of an athlete!) yet something about him still spoke to me (when I first e-mailed him, I asked if he worked with "less-young adults." He used that phrase back to me, which suggested to me he was a keeper, as some may have said, "Yes I work with clients of all ages" or something like that. Yes, I have somewhat random ways of assessing people at times!).
So that makes sense to try to think of it that way. He's said before he's not psychodynamically trained (which ex-MC was and...well...Ex-T was not--she's a social worker and more trained in CBT and stuff like that). He is a PhD, but I'm not fully clear what modality he was trained in (his degree just says Clinical Psychology I think). He also seems more goal-oriented in therapy in general than ex-MC (well, wouldn't take much for him!) or ex-T (well, she was goal-oriented in the beginning, I guess). Like saying "What I want for you ix X." Which helps that he seems to have some sort of vision for me (and it seems to match what I want).
Wow, that was an excessive number of parentheticals... But I think you're right that it's more I'm judging myself. So maybe need to try saying it that way to him? Not sure... Because, I mean, if a coach is like "your throwing mechanics are off," and the player is like, "I feel judged!" well I doubt they'd last too long in the major leagues...