I have a similar problem with my mom
For now we are still living together and she is an alcoholic for a long time now (coping method for a complicated life i guess) and i also let her do her think as i am tired to fight with her and want to avoid confrontation as much as i can
She is going to retire by the end of the month of her job and go back to her country of origins (at least for a few months)
And i feel so relieve that i won't have to watch her when she will be there that i at the same time feel so selfish and bad at the same time
You are just trying to protect yourself by letting things like that
Is there something that you like doing together ? watch a tv show, taking a stroll?
just to have a moment, a good one, to remember why you got together