I know what you mean. I have an incredibly hard time trusting. I used to be different until I was let down by my entire family, abandoned by several others, and pretty much rejected by my high school and college communities. I have 3 close friends who I made before my life started falling into depression/anxiety/etc., and one of them knows most of what's going on in my life, while the other 2 have a decent idea. I have some acquaintances and such, but of course I have to put on a mask around them and everybody else. I even feel like I have to put on a happy mask around my bests sometimes. I just can't seem to completely trust anyone, and I don't want to burden the friends I already have too much. But I think that sharing on an online community like this can be very helpful, at least, it is for me. Having an anonymous identity for some reason makes it easier for me to share.