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Right now in session the one part that seems to come out is the one that just shuts the system down and won't talk. It happens when things become difficult to talk to or I feel backed into a corner.
I can feel it come on. It is so weird. The entire right side of my face feels heavy and pressurized especially in my right eye. Feels like it is being squeezed. I feel like I could lay down and sleep. My emotions become flat and I do not react to anything. My memory of the session becomes foggy and I remember fragments of it. I feel I just have issues with memory recall when I think about the session the next day.
Anyway I always thought this was the "Freeze" response in PTSD as that is what I was originally diagnosed with but I never remember the physical sensations when it came on like it happens in the therapy room.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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