My girlfriend & I have been together 14 years. I can understand the overwhelming urge to be alone...during my depressed periods, I want nothing more than to crawl up into a ball & cut myself off from others. Even when I'm not depressed there are times when I want utter silence...I don't want to listen to the TV, anyone's voice...NOTHING! I just want silence. It's like the most simple noises grate on my nerves...it can be almost painful. Having expressed that, however, I have to realize that I'm in a happy, healthy relationship (no verbal altercations, or major disagreements). Plus, she puts up with my bipolar shite; I think she's a saint!

To me, it sounds like you & your partner share a lot of freedom & some room to grow. I don't know of too many people who would accept a poly relationship...but that might just be generational. If you feel the relationship is really holding you back from personal growth, GET OUT! However, there's an old song that goes, "You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone." If your need to be alone stems from baseline depression, beware. Now...I'll go back to minding my own business...