Hi,
I’ve been dating a women I love for 5 years, during the beginning of our relationship things were fine. It took a turn for the worst about two or three years in. When she was a child she struggled with OCD, and it had come back. I was fine with it, having dealt with mental illness myself. I didn’t understand it, she thought things were dirty all the time, and stopped cleaning. Trash was piling in the house and when I would try to clean things, she’d get aggressive and yell at me ask what I touched (She won’t let me clean). During this time I became very angry with her because I couldn’t cook my own food, I was only allowed access to one room in the house. What made me angrier, is that she had a friend that she would always go to their house. I was mad at this because 1. Our house was a mess and she wasn’t at home cleaning it, or letting me clean 2. Negative things at this friends household was taking place (Drinking, Fighting, ETC) 3. It felt like her friend’s word took priority over mines. I was feeling insecure at this time. The women I love was showing little care in my prospective to our relationship. I didn’t go and hang out with her friends because the alcohol use between her friend and her boyfriend, I don’t like to surround myself with stuff like that. I was invited, but I always turned it down. There’s always other men over there, which I didn’t like and I expressed it to her, which became a fight. I said things to her that I look back on and regret. They were hurtful. I have this problem where I get mad when she goes to her friend’s house. I’m not trying to be controlling, but she thinks I am (One the reasons why I’m on here is to get different views). I just really feel like she invest too much time into a friend when she has a child and a person she would like to marry one day to invest into. I can admit I’m am jealous of the relationship she has with this women. She talk to her much nicer than she talks to me and respect her opinion over mines (I can give her the same advise her friend did, month before she tells her, and then she give her friend the credit) she’ll spend 8 hours with her friend, then when she get home sit on the phone with her until 2 am and turn around and call her at 7am. I don’t get it. I’m looking for help. Any suggestion or advice I would appreciate it. I’m struggling with this its making me super depressed. I want to fix this, if possible.