I feel this way too a lot. I've even joined things like Weight Watchers and done good for a couple weeks, then fell off the wagon and couldn't continue. Also bought a nearly $200 piece of exercise equipment thinking that something that expensive would motivate me to use it... I said to myself "just half an hour a day, that's it" and thought for sure I could stick to it. I've had the thing over a year now, only used it one full 30 minute session. Part of the problem is the seat is extremely uncomfortable, but the other part of it isn't something you sit on so I could use that but just... don't.

I guess my advice (what little it might be worth) would be to find a reason for the motivation other than you "want" or "need" to. I feel like that's a big part of my problem. Because of the depression I often get in these moods where I just don't care about myself and so doing it for me is no motivation at all. I don't really have anyone else to do it for though. I'd like to think that if I ever got a significant other that I would do it for them because they deserve the best version of me. I also sort of want to do it because I don't want my nephew growing up remembering me as "the fat aunt" or something... But then that just makes me feel bad too so yeah.

I guess I'm mainly here to say you're not alone in those feels and that I hope you do find the motivation somewhere. Maybe under a couch cushion? Lots of things hide there.