Well... I did read your whole post... (no skimming.) Unfortunately, having written that, I'm not sure there's really a lot I can offer in the way of suggestions. The two things I know are... there's no way you can know for certain what's going on in your (ex?) bf's mind. And there's also no way you can control what he does... or doesn't do. Ultimately you only have control over yourself. So I think what you may have to do here is to decide how you need to proceed in order to protect yourself as well as to move forward with your life... painful as that may be.

There is a danger here that you will become so entangled in trying to figure out what your bf is thinking, what he's doing, & what that means for the future of your relationship (if anything) that you find it harder-&-harder to let go. At some point, my personal opinion would be, you have to simply make a clean break & move on. There's no way I can say if now is the time though. That may be something you would be better able to work out with the help of a counselor or mental health therapist. I wish you well...