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Originally Posted by SalingerEsme
This is what my T said too, and he kind of gave me informed consent about how much this would hurt, and it does.
I understand we have to carry our own pain through the world, no matter who originally inflicted it and who wants to teach the skills to integrate it. I guess my prefrontal cortex comprehends that, but the whiplash between this shadowy safey office world in which kind blue eyes stare into mine and alternate really intense questions about way too intimate subjects with so much touch on language, metaphors and symbols, and then trying to pull it back together for sunny days, chitchatty world, 15 hour work days, puppies and boyfriend is like having two unrelated lives within one person.
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Do you feel like you're in control of the pace? If I'm having more stressors or turmoil or even something banal like a minor illness, I know I am perfectly within my rights to pull back from the heavy stuff until I feel better. My T encourages it, in fact. The chance of re-injuring yourself is way too high if you forge ahead when you aren't really able to accommodate the things that are coming up for you. Being overwhelmed and unable to function properly in your life is not the path to integration, in my opinion. You're just going to end up with pain that serves no purpose. I think this is doubly true if your T doesn't provide a safety net via outside contact to help you tuck away the things that leak out when you are not in the office.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SalingerEsme
We talked about the fall of Junot Diaz briefly, and his comment was whatever women went through, it is good his daughter will grow up in a safer world bc of # me too. This is a good example of me struggling with myself and my suddenly unreasonable feelings. My brain understands this and agrees, but my heart flinched bc he seemed to show his hand that he doesn't truly empathize, but his beautiful empathy is a skill set which makes is hollow or makes it hard to suspend disbelief and go with it.
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I'm with ruh roh. This would have been a one-way ticket to Rupture Town for me. What does his daughter's relative safety have to do with your healing? Is he so hellbent on proving his "wokeness" that he will trample over your sensitive spots? That is sloppy therapy, at best.